Category Archives: miscellaneous

Health, miscellaneous

A Sign of Aging?

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You see many things about aging. Now that I’m in the senior citizen category, I pay more attention to them. Sometimes I identify way too much with them.

A little at the end of the nostril each night makes me sleep a little better.

My day to go to Wal-Mart for groceries is, at the moment, Thursday. I was going on Friday (a change from pre-retirement Saturday), but shifted to Thursday, probably for no good reason. The store is a little less crowded Thursday afternoon compared to Friday afternoon.

So last Thursday (not yesterday) I went. I took with me six cloth grocery bags. I hate to bring home a bunch of plastic bags. We recycle them when we get them, taking them to a thrift store for re-use, but I still hate to take them. I stuffed the six bags in the seat portion of the shopping cart and proceeded with my shopping.

One item on my list from the pharmacy section was a bottle of Vicks VaporRub. Actually, I would be okay with the generic store brand and intended to get that. But this WM is re-merchandising and updating everything. That day they were working on the pharmacy shelves, and had the aisle blocked that I needed to go down. But, on the end-cap was a display with small bottles of Vicks. I said the heck with going around to get to the aisle from the other way, so I picked up a box of Vicks and put it in the basket.

Later, at the check out, my purchases needed only four of the six cloth bags. I left the other two in the basket, paid, walked out to the car. When I loaded things in I found the Vicks, still in the basket, hiding with the two extra bags and obviously not paid for.

What should I do? Obviously I should walk back to the store from my distant parking space and pay for it. I decided not to and drove on home. At some point while driving, I realized I could bring it back on my next trip to Wal-Mart and pay for it with the next week’s purchases. That seemed like a good plan. I managed to (unintentionally) sneak it out of Wal-Mart, surely I could sneak it in.

The next day, Friday, I thought I should put that box in a prominent place on the kitchen table so that I wouldn’t forget it on my next trip. But, the box was nowhere to be found. I hadn’t put it in the bathroom or on my night stand or on the dining room table or on the kitchen table or on the kitchen counter or anywhere such products might be put while waiting to be taken to their proper place. Where was that thing? I began to think maybe I had left it in the shopping cart. That would have been fitting since I didn’t pay for it. And the double absent-mindedness was certainly a sign that I have for certain taken my place among the ranks of senior citizens.

Yes, I really did it.

The story continues, however. Sunday, as I was fixing a couple of fresh vegetables to go with our leftover stir-fry, as I pulled things out of the vegetable drawer in the fridge, there was the box of Vicks, hiding beneath some zucchini. I include the photo to show that it really did happen. It was indeed double absent-mindedness, just in a different way than expected.

The end of the story is anticlimactic. Yesterday I brought the Vick with me to Wal-Mart, hiding beneath those same cloth bags in the shopping cart basket. I went through the store, made my selections, and checked out, making sure this time the Vicks was on the conveyor. I told the clerk about it, and we had a good laugh together at my expense.

So, while I may be of a certain age, when the brain and many other functions begin to go, or have already gone, I had the wherewithal to sneak something into Wal-Mart. I’ll feel good about that for a while.

 

Bible study, miscellaneous, reading, trials

A Self-Taught Lesson

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In recent weeks I have experienced three instances where “wrongs” were done against me, at least in my perception. I don’t want to go into any details. Let’s just say that two of the three are certain, while the third is “iffy”.

The last two of these, the certain ones, were on the same day,  almost on top of each other. It threw me for a loop for a couple of days. I went around depressed—not a clinical type depression, but more of a  wondering how to handle the two situations. One of them, if I didn’t want to, I would never have to see the person again. The other didn’t include that luxury. The third, the lesser one, was more a case of where I was very disappointed in someone’s words, words not directed at me but at a situation in life in general.

If I remember correctly, the two things happened on a Friday. Saturday evening, as is my habit, I took a look at the Life Group lesson I would teach the next day. It was Jesus cursing the fig tree, it shriveling up, and how he taught the disciples from this. It’s found in the two of the gospels, Matthew and Mark. I studied from my “Harmony of the Gospels”. It’s been enjoyable to use my own study tool for this series.

Jesus cursed the fig tree on Monday of Holy Week. He said, “May no one ever eat fruit from you again!” It was on Tuesday, when they passed the same way to go to Jerusalem that the disciples noticed the tree had withered. They questioned Jesus about how this happened, to which he replied that through prayer this was possible, using his metaphor of the mountain being cast into the sea.

But then, he added something, sort of the unsolicited advice he gave when he noted the true condition of someone’s mind and heart before they did. He said, “And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive him, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sin.” This particular teaching is found in Matthew but not Mark.

This hit me hard. I realized I held something against someone, against three someones. If I were praying, and if I expected my prayers to be successful, I needed to forgive them. I wasn’t to wait for them to realize the wrong they’d done and ask for forgiveness. My forgiving them was to be instantaneous, and not asked for. This wasn’t something to delay into the future, when next we meet.

As I studied my lesson, I kept coming back to that concept. Maybe the things I held against these people weren’t wrongs at all. Perhaps my perception of what they did was wrong. Perhaps what they did was unintentional: they didn’t recognize what the consequences of their action or words would be. None of that mattered. I was to forgive.

My forgiveness would be for me, not for them. They wouldn’t know about it. The scripture doesn’t say I’m to seek them out and express this forgiveness to them. How would that sound? “Hey, sir or madam, you don’t realize you wronged me, and you haven’t asked for forgiveness, but I forgive you anyways.” No, I don’t think that’s what Jesus intended. You forgive, immediately, whether they ever ask or not.

So, I did that. I forgave each of them, and hold no animosity to them. In one case I could see that the person was actually helpful, but did so in a clumsy way. Another was a simple mental lapse due to disorganization, certainly with no evil intent. The third is a difference of opinion, and will likely forever remain so. I ought to be able to allow others to have different opinions without holding a grudge.

I learned my lesson. Let’s hope that I’ll be able to put it into practice going forward without having those bad moments of moping about wrongs or perceived wrongs.

Adam Of Jerusalem, Documenting America, miscellaneous, trials, Writing

Still Getting Things Done (in Retirement)

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When I was a full-time, working engineer, not all that long ago, I used to occasionally post about getting things done. This would be at times of particular busyness, or perhaps when I was able to complete a major writing task in the face of a normal heavy schedule at work.

Now retired, for not quite two months, I find I’m not getting to all my tasks as well as I’d like to. Last Friday, I felt so overwhelmed by needed to do things, I made a to-do list. First on that was “Fix toilet”. The flush valve in the master bathroom had quit working a day or two before. It wouldn’t shut off when the tank filled. I went out on Thursday to get the new works to put in, but didn’t get it in.

Last Friday I was asked to attend a meeting in my consultant roll for my former company, which meant I didn’t get right on that job. I finally did Friday afternoon, but, as inept as I am with plumbing work, I couldn’t get everything right. So we still couldn’t use that bathroom.

I’ll cut this short, because nobody likes to hear stories about toilets. On Saturday I re-did it and managed to get the works properly installed. However, I loosened something on the supply line, and we still had a small leak. It was then the Presidents Day weekend, so I wasn’t able to call our plumber till Tuesday. He came Wednesday and fixed it, a minor adjustment in the tightness of the supply line. No charge. One thing off the list.

Last Friday morning we woke up to frozen precipitation from the night. I started our old van to clear ice from the windshield, giving myself plenty of time to make my appointment. The street appeared to be mostly dry. I came out a few minutes later, hopped in the van, put it in reverse, and promptly rolled forward. I jammed on the breaks in time so that it didn’t hit the garage. Only then did I notice the van had stalled. It has such a quiet engine I didn’t notice that.

Now I had to start the new van, clear the ice from the windshield, and hurry to my meeting. I made it with a little to spare. It was coming home from that that I tackled the toilet job.

I won’t bore you with the rest of my to-do list from last weekend. Taking down the majority of the Christmas decorations that we’d never done was one thing accomplished and checked-off. Many smaller tasks remained. Most of those were checked off as well.

As for writing tasks, I did such things as:

  • read submissions for the new critique group
  • begin beta-reading a friend’s book
  • print a copy of Adam Of Jerusalem and deliver it to my third beta-reader
  • finish the Table of Contents for my next book, Documenting America: Making The Constitution Edition.

That brought me through the holiday (which didn’t feel like a holiday for me except that the stock market was closed). I think it was on Tuesday that I was in The Dungeon. I made some trades when the market opened, read and critiqued another submission for critique group, and sat back. My to-do list had been completed—almost. All I didn’t do was contact the potential cover artist for AoJ. What should I do next?

Almost out of the blue it occurred to me that I could begin my real work on DA:MCE, which is: reading the source documents, editing them down to reasonable length, writing an intro, writing historical context, and writing the current events tie-in. So I indeed did that. As of yesterday, I had completed three chapters, about a tenth of the book.

I can’t tell you how good that felt. I should be able to complete two chapters ever three days, meaning that the first draft of the book could be ready around mid-April, and I could be publishing it in mid-May. Now that’s getting things done.

But, I must report on one more important item. I don’t know if I’ve written before that I still haven’t had my Social Security and Medicare Part B approved and activated. I didn’t realize how long the government took to get this done. Two things that slowed it down was the fact that the IRS had an identity flag on my SS number due to the identity theft attempt from 2017; the other was, perhaps, the government shut down. Also, it seemed I had given them a wrong phone number to reach me at.

They finally contacted me while I was in Texas early this month. They assured me my application was moving and my benefits would be retroactive to January 1st, both Social Security and Medicare Part B. That was good, but I still couldn’t apply for supplemental insurance until all that was settled. While this was mostly out of my hands, it was still something that I felt like was on my to-do list, to get this done.

Yesterday I realized I still hadn’t heard from them that my benefits had started, so I shot the woman I’ve had contact with an e-mail, asking for a status update. Then, last night, I pulled up my on-line banking to make sure the checkbook was up to date. Lo and behold, there was a SS deposit for me, made on Wednesday, for one month’s SS payment. I still haven’t had any paperwork come in the mail, but there was money in my account.

That means that my Medicare part B is also established, which means that today I can call the supplemental insurance company I want to use and get that going. that is on my today list. As are a number of other items, but at least I’m feeling good about getting things done.

Oh, yes, about the van. I finally made arrangements yesterday afternoon  for it to be towed to the nearby Dodge dealership. This morning they called me. The did a normal servicing, but otherwise could find nothing wrong with it. What in the world? I guess I’ll go down and get it, and maybe it really is okay. But at least it’s checked off my to-do list.

Now, what needs to be added?

Adam Of Jerusalem, Health, holidays, miscellaneous, Writing

Still No New Normal

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Somewhere in this house, most likely in one of two places, I have a list started of blog posts I want to do. The list is on paper, one of the pads I want to use up rather than just discard. Do you think this morning, my regular day for blogging, I can find it? Of course not.

Instead of whatever I was thinking of for today, I’ll just post a stream-of-thought thing. What popped into my head was: I still haven’t found my new normal in retirement.

I have many things I should be doing. De-cluttering is a key one. Lynda has started on some de-cluttering, in a small way only but it’s a start. I’ve been working on it for a while, but haven’t done anything major for a while.

My main decluttering has been a little printing I did. How is that decluttering, you ask? It was four pages for the members of my new critique group. I printed them on the backs of old printed pages. I have two stacks of these, which are somewhat unobtrusive piles in two places, one quite large the other small. But, since I brought the pages back home with me, you might ask how is that decluttering? Once I incorporate their comments into my chapter, I’ll discard them into recycling. This is a departure from the past, where I kept all such critique sheets. No more.

Also yesterday I printed my completed novel, Adam Of Jerusalem, for my last editing pass through it. All 217 sheets are on reused paper. So, once I finish with this, it will be taken to recycling as well. The pile I pulled all these sheets from may in fact look a little smaller.

Today is a holiday, Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. Day. But now that I’m retired, it’s the same as other week days except the stock market is closed. I’m free to do whatever I want. I don’t even have to prepare any food, as we have left-overs from the prior cooking.

So what am I going to do? I should try to read 100 pages in the novel, editing as I go. I will try to find that list of blog post, and put it where I can find it when I need it. I’ll hit the elliptical, and try to do 1.2 miles on it in 0.2 mile increments. I’ll walk outside, hopefully my 2.4 mile route. It would be nice to read something for leisure, maybe something out of the large magazine pile (which will be multi-tasking since it will also count as decluttering). We may also head into town for a noon service celebrating MLK’s life. We’ll see.

Tomorrow will be another day into retirement. Perhaps, with the stock market open and having trades to make and watch, it will feel a little closer to a new normal.

Adam Of Jerusalem, Bible study, Genealogy, Life Group lessons, miscellaneous, research, Writing

Writing In Retirement

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Well, you would think that, after almost a week of retirement (five days, actually, today being the beginning of the sixth), I would have accomplished much on writing. You would be wrong.

I actually started the year spending more time on genealogy and stock trading than anything else. Stock trading because it’s a new year, I needed new spreadsheets, and I needed to be active in it and try to make some money. Genealogy because I love to do it so much, and I had some new leads—or rather a little bit older leads I’d been holding off on until retirement. Following those leads now.

I’ve been holding off on writing also because I had much to do in life, and I knew retirement was coming. But retirement came, and I felt that I needed to get a few other things done first. Lynda is ill, with the flue, and it doesn’t seem to be going away quickly. Perhaps she had bronchitis as well. So I’m having to do some things for her. It’s not a burden, however. I’m glad the family sickness passed me by and I’m able to pick up the load.

I haven’t been totally absent on writing, however. A few days ago I saw a notice in a Bella Vista Facebook page about a new writing critique group someone want to form. I contacted her, and it looks as if it will happen, a once-a-month group at her house. I’m looking forward to that.

Last night I pulled out the manuscript of Adam Of Jerusalem, and began going through it looking for places where I’d marked I needed to add Adam’s backstory. Found them, and began to work on that backstory. I have the notebook next to me, in The Dungeon, and will work on it today.

These are somewhat feeble efforts, however. I wanted to get some other things done first. I felt that writing time would come shortly, and I needed to get my family budget up to date first, then file receipts, then clean up certain clutter stacks, then start a jigsaw puzzle (yes, did that yesterday). Saturday I made wonderful progress on all of these, which gave me freedom of mind to do a little on writing yesterday. Oh, yes, somewhere along the way I knew I needed to start doing some more healthy things. I’ve been doing that, though I need to ramp it up some still. Over time, over time.

Another thing I did was work some (on Saturday, I think it was), on the outline/programming of a Life Group lesson series my co-teacher and I had discussed. I like the way it’s coming together. It concerns Jesus’ activities during Holy Week. Three of the planned lessons might be a little thin on teachable/discussable material, so I’m doing a little more research on them. I should finish that today.

The last thing I’ve done is try to plan out what exactly I’m going to write in 2019. I have a list of things. I don’t know if it’s complete yet, and it’s certainly not prioritized. It reflects my Genre Focus Disorder; it reflect the fact that I have much I want to write; it also reflects that I now see myself with more time to write than I ever had before. I intend to work on that list this week, and maybe have it in shape to report it on my Friday blog.

Planning is fine, but doing is better. Time to leave this and post it, and get to my other work. See you all on Friday.

Adam Of Jerusalem, Engineering, miscellaneous, Writing

Needing Discipline

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Turning an infiltration pond, which didn’t infiltrate, into a filtering pond.

My last post was on September 11. At that time, I was planning for trips to Minnesota to oversee a construction project. That the trips would happen was sure, but the timing was unknown. The first one could happen in a day; it could wait a week or more. I couldn’t order tickets, couldn’t plan my schedule.

During this waiting period, I let blogging go. I even let most of my writing go. Otherwise, I kept to my normal schedule and tasks.

Finally the schedule became clear. I made three trips to Minneapolis and watched the re-construction of two stormwater ponds. The main work was on Saturdays (since it was at an active childcare facility) with prep work done on Thursday and Friday. Each time I flew up for the prep work and flew back on Sunday. I decided I’m too old to rush to get to the airport, return a rental car, and rush to a plane.

Sometimes it got messy.

It’s almost over. I have one trip next week, on election day, for a final inspection. That should be it, unless they pay me to go up next summer to check on how the vegetation is doing.

That’s over. But getting back to the disciplines I set aside for a while has been hard. My weight is up, my blood sugar is up, and my writing time is down. I’m also getting closer to that magic last day of work, December 31st this year, knowing I’ll have oodles of writing time on the flip side. That’s made my motivation lag.

It looked good once it was done.

The one good thing I did was write in hotel rooms while I was out of town. I was able to finish my novel-in-progress, Adam Of Jerusalem. That was a good thing. I’m now reading it aloud and editing as I go. It’s clunky, and will need significant editing. I don’t believe I’ll publish it this year.

So, hopefully you’ll see me back to my regular Monday and Friday posting. Hopefully my posts will be meaningful. And hopefully I’ll hang on to writing in the 1 month and 29 days of working life I have left.

family, memories, miscellaneous

What’s Up With August?

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About a week ago I remembered that I was right about the time of an anniversary—within a day or two of it. It got me thinking about all the things that have happened in the Augusts of my life. That’s not to say all momentous things happened in August. I met the woman I would marry in May, and we were married in January. Our children were born in January and April. All but one of our various moves happened in other months. Yes, the entire calendar is filled with important things, spread out.

But, it seems to me that August has claimed more than its fair share. Several of these events are wrapped around my genealogy research, so are not really a result of outside causes.

Here they are, in the order they occurred.

  • August 19, 1965: My mom died. I was 13.
  • August 2, 1990: Iraq invaded Kuwait, which was my expatriate home. We were in the USA on vacation at the time, and couldn’t go back as a family, though both Lynda and I got to go back, recover some things of our life there, and say goodbye.
  • August 26, 1997: My dad died, at age 81.
  • August 1998: I don’t remember the exact date of this one; it was toward the end of the month. Using clues I found when we cleaned out Dad’s house after his death, I made contact with my mom’s family. She was an only child and supposedly had no cousins. In fact, on her mom’s side, she was one of 11 first cousins plus 5 step-first cousins. I had my first phone calls with them in August, and met the first ones in November.
  • August 13, 2005: I was contacted by one of Lynda’s cousins, a first cousin once removed, to share genealogy information. I had this woman’s name in a file based on what Lynda’s dad left behind, but had no idea how to contact her. She found me based on my posts on various genealogy internet sites. This was a branch of the family I had little information on. Now I have it complete.
  • My half-sister and me in Branson, MO; Oct 2014

    August 11, 2014: A cousin in New York—one of those 11 first cousins of my mom discovered in 1998—contacted me, saying she had been contacted by a woman who had been adopted at birth but who, DNA testing revealed, was related. Looking at the data, it appeared my mother was her mother. I talked with the woman the next day and we began the process of confirming what the data suggested. Sure enough, DNA confirmed she was my half-sister. That confirmation came on September 1, 2014. Missed August by a day.

  • August 2015: No longer able to live on her own, my mother-in-law came to live with us.
  • August 2017: I’m not sure the exact date, but probably before August 10, using DNA triangulation, I was able to determine with great certainty who my mother’s father was. Before that I had a name, given me by my not-always-truthful grandmother, but had reached a dead end confirming it. That confirmation came when three of us had certain common relatives on 23andme. That allowed me to know what to search for, and in a matter of two hours I had found many official documents about my grandfather, including his World War 1 Canadian military record. That gave me 13 new first cousins (well, half-first-cousins, but let’s not be picky) and numerous other relatives. I haven’t put together the full list of my mom’s first cousins. DNA confirmation of this information came several months later.

So there’s the list. I don’t know how they strike you, but to me they are all momentous events.

But, am I over-thinking this? Might I not find, if I searched my life, that each month would have it’s collection of momentous events? Perhaps. For now, however, I’ll stick with August as the pivotal month in many of the years of my life.

miscellaneous, Writing

Late—Just Staying Busy

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Yes, I’m late for my Monday post. I like to post around 7:30 a.m., yet here it is after 8:30 p.m. Hey, at least it’s still my posting day. Except, of course, I didn’t post anything for Friday. So maybe someone could say this is very late for Friday’s post.

What keeps me from making my posts regular and on time? Up until a few months back I would write my Monday post on Sunday afternoon, and schedule it to post on Monday. I didn’t do that yesterday, as I wanted to get back to work on my novel. Then, Monday morning before work, I continued to work on a certain writing project, the research for it, which I do a little on every morning before I start my day. That keeps me from writing before I start work, and getting to a post during the day isn’t always possible. I’m laying that research project aside after this week, so maybe I’ll have mornings for blogging.

I suppose I have some lethargy and brain tiredness. Now only 4 months and 17 days from retirement, I find myself busier at work than I’ve been in a dozen years. Our engineering group is short handed and they need me to step away from training and do some work on projects. Plus the intensity of the work leaves me mostly brain dead at the end of the day. There’s no way I can come home on Thursday and write a post and schedule it for the next day. My brain power isn’t there.

I’m not sure what it would take to get back to a regular blogging schedule, which I was able to do fairly well in 2017. 2018 isn’t working for me, however. 2019 will be my first year of retirement. Hopefully I’ll find the time and brain power coming together at the same time, and will blog twice a week. Plus work simultaneously on two works-in-progress; plus pick up old abandoned projects and see what to do with them; plus start a newsletter and try to build a mailing list.

We’ll just have to see. Stay tuned.

miscellaneous

Major Tasks Done – Minor Tasks Pending

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May 1st arrived this year, with me overwhelmed by several major tasks that needed to be taken care of. These were sapping my brain power, even making me unable to concentrate on many other things needed.

One task was finding a new family car. We decided to do this almost a year ago, but had trouble finding the one we wanted. We finally found something close, though at a dealer in Oklahoma City. Since we have multiple trips there to help our daughter’s family move, that worked out well. We bought the new van on May 18. Our oldest grandson named it the Silver Dragon, a name that I guess will stick. One main task out of the way. The actual completion of this task was held up in a paperwork mix-up by the dealership. That was completed the week before last, and the vehicle is legal.

A second main task was selling my now-not-needed pick-up. I didn’t want to advertise it until we had the new car. Even then I was slow to do so. But I mentioned to a colleague in another engineering company it was for sale. He spread the word, and one of his co-workers wanted it for his son. The deal was concluded, then he moved out of state and said he didn’t need it. I was getting ready to advertise it when his daughter contacted me, saying she wanted it based on her dad’s recommendation. She picked it up two weeks ago. Task #2 out of the way.

The biggest task was finding a new living situation for my mother-in-law. She’s lived with us for 2 1/2 years. Her care was beginning to increase, and she and my wife didn’t get along all that well. For her sake, we needed to find her a place to live—not a nursing home, though, as she wasn’t in need of that much care.  My wife looked around, and found a room available at an assisted living facility just a little over a mile from our house. She moved there around May 15, and seems to be happy and acclimating well. Task #3 out of the way. Obviously my numbering scheme is in relation to the order of them in this post, not in terms of importance or of completion.

Scheduling a trip to see our son in Chicago, and actually doing that, which we hadn’t done in many years was another major task. We did that last weekend, taking six days including drive time and a day in Springfield IL on the return trip. We had a great time, and our son seemed to as well. Another major task completed, but I don’t want it to appears it was a “task”, as the word carries negative connotations. It was something we wanted to do and did it, something that, once done, allowed me to concentrate on other things.

One other task was the paperwork following my auto accident in February. That’s not actually complete, but the main work of it is. I settled with the other guy’s insurance company for an amount (less than I hoped for). We’re just waiting for some late medical bills to come in, after which it will all be settled.

Which brings me to minor tasks. One of those is semi-major, working out a dispute between my company and a client, on a project I took over for someone else who has since left the company. The negotiations are about over. Now we’re at the point where we have to have the corrections constructed at the site. That will require me to travel to Minneapolis once or twice. That’s a significant task, but is doable, and I have help within the company.

I have a few maintenance tasks around our property, and tasks related to de-cluttering. I’m pleased, in general, with how they’re going. Still plenty to do, but I see progress being made.

Which brings me down to today. Yesterday afternoon I went to The Dungeon after church and lunch. It had been over ten days since I’d written a blog post. I decided that, rather than work on my novel, I should take time to write a real post. So I worked on this. I hope this is the first step in getting back to regular blogging. Monday and Friday are my posting days. See you on Friday, I hope, with a substantial post.

miscellaneous

Once Again, Busyness Descends

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It’s Friday, my normal day for posting. Yet here I am with nothing prepared. I lost time last night to having to run to the pharmacy to get a new prescription for my mother-in-law, who was supposed to start on it last night. I wanted to spend a half hour blackberry picking, which I did. In that half hour I probably could have pulled together a post, but the exercise and solitude did me good.

I hope the weekend gives me some time to prepare a real post for Monday. I hope.