It was about June 1998. I obtained some data about my maternal family from old address books of my grandmother that I took from my dad’s house after his death. We knew almost nothing about her family except her mother’s name (Rita Harris, the last name from a later marriage) and that she was from St. Lucia; the names of two half-sisters, Hiris and Hazel (but not, at that time, of the third, Muriel). My grandmother had told us her half-sisters were spinsters who had no children. But in the address books I found their names with different last names. Both Hiris and Hazel were in NY, but Hazel’s address was changed from NY to Alburquerque.
Making a long story a little shorter, another name with a New Mexico address was Evelyn Menzies. I sent to the Albuquerque newspaper for an obituary for Hazel (who I learned had died there in 1993), which listed Evelyn Menzies as her daughter. If Hazel was my grandmother’s half-sister, Evelyn would be my mom’s half-first-cousin and her children my half-second-cousins.
I decided to write Evelyn out of the blue, saying you probably don’t know who I am, but my research suggests you’re my mom’s cousin. Here’s how that letter started:
My name is David Todd. I am the grandson of Alfy M. (Sexton) Dorion, who was a half-sister of Hazel (Harris) Wildman. My research indicates that you are Hazel’s daughter. I got your address from the Albuquerque phone book, and your name from Hazel’s obituary. My purpose in writing to you is to introduce myself and to hopefully share family history and information.
While growing up, I knew that my grandmother had two half-sisters, Hiris and Hazel, but we never had any contact with them, never knew their last names, if they had families, etc. While going through dad’s papers over the last eight months (he died last August), I found address books which included Hiris’ name and address in New York City, and Hazel’s name and addresses in NYC and then Albuquerque. I next checked the Social Security Death Index, which listed both Hiris and Hazel and gave death dates and locations. Finding Hazel as having died in Albuquerque in 1993, I sent off to the newspaper for a copy of her obituary. It arrived yesterday.
I gave her information about the family and an anecdote about my great-grandmother so that she would know that I really knew her. Before long Evelyn called me. She said she knew who I was, that she had always known about her cousin Dorothy and her three children, even had pictures of us. I asked her why we never knew about them, and why my grandmother never had photos or them. Evelyn said, “It’s because we’re black.”
She went on to say that my great-grandmother was approximately 1/2 black, meaning I was part black. That was a bombshell, listening to Evelyn on the phone that Sunday in August, 1998 and hearing her strong Brooklyn accent. I had no idea.
Evelyn invited us to come to NM and meet them. We did that in November 1998. Evelyn put together some meetings with other family in the area. I met all her children and their children. It was a great time. A couple of years later Evelyn had us back for their son’s wedding, and then came to our daughter’s wedding.
Our contacts in person were few after that, but we kept in touch by phone. I found it incredible that she accepted us so readily into her family. Through the meetings, Evelyn told me much about our mutual family and what she knew about the St. Lucia years. Because of her, a new world and culture opened to me.
Evelyn died on August 14 [see her obituary here] after a long life, her children, grandchildren, and great-grandchildren gathered around her. She is already missed by them all, me included.
